It only gets harder the more that you know.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
im empty. this hollow space inside is driving me nuts. its funny how the things that scared me most turned out to the things that ultimately bring me comfort. this has to be the most confusing period in my life. im being led in this direction then in that direction. eventually i still do not know what was the purpose of all these. and my incessant efforts in filling up the vacuum only voids it even more. at the end of the day, its more empty than ever.
mambo night at zouk on wednesday. meil and chien went in first. i waited outside for almost 20 mins before zouk is opened. saw some girl being bounced but i recognise willy the pr. smiled at him and he remembers me as a staff. luck was on my side. didnt see aunt elsie either. mambo music is BAD. seriously the guy on the podium looks like a damn fag doing all those actions. his facial expressions was a major turnoff as well. we couldnt take it anymore after about ten mins on the dancefloor and went over to phuture. oh yes, saw jw at the bag corner, *Ahem finds him PRETTTY PRETTY cute. haha.
woo, i like the music there. it was quite crowded by the time we went in. danced with a scorpio and meil saw her scorpio so they ran away. i went off awhile later to look for them at the toilet. while waiting for them, there was this stupid guy that pulled me off to the exit corner and start asking me stupid question like whether i want to know him or not, OMG. and i kept repeating myself over and over again do i know you do i know you although my head was spinning like a top and i couldnt really walk properly.
lucky thing i spotted them before he did anything more. walked to zouk again and the music was still as horrible as ever and the crowd was sooooooo old so we went back to phuture. met this really cute capri that was too many tads too egoistic. he treated me and chien some shots and asked if we wanted to join them for supper. but it was only 3 and so we went back to dance. saw the botak. wow, but he was dancing with a really horny face so we moved our way through. saw the exit sign weirdo and ran away. i think i drank too much cause i shouted no very loudly when someone invited us to dance. okay, this was wed.
went to DXO on thurs. there was some party going on and liyun was selling the tickets. danced with a group of SA boys at first and i deeply regret telling him i was from CJ. sigh. i ran away when he started getting touchy and danced with the girls and the guys they were dancing with. i didnt get to dance with the cute beanie boy cus this bespectacled nerd was in the way! anw, saw ryan and im quite taken aback he still recognises me! smsed me if i wanted to dance but i didnt reply. alot of the guys that night were wearing spectacles. rather weird.
the SA guy came over to us after the party ended and lucky thing we were with another group of guys. i talked with my back facing him. :/ went to the marina square's 7-11 with the guys. i think the leo is pretty cute but he was singing emo songs and he seriously looked like he just broke up with his gf. haha. so many things i want to say but i dont think its safe. argh. sat all the way till 6 and cabbed to chien's house. they are one funny group of guys. meil smsed me on sat and said that the emo leo asked us to club that night but we couldnt. i was working and anw, stayed out for too many nights.
this is one long entry. im typing with a bad throbbing head. shall edit if i can remember anything else. oh yes, dance on monday. wee. at last.
2:57 AM